Under the Light of Day Most of our self or external criticism cannot withstand the simple but often unasked question, “Is it true?” An objective self-assessment casts aside negative beliefs and their harmful consequences. A friend recently attended a high-brow executive leadership program at Yale University and I requested a meeting to discuss one of my serious issues. Before we could take our...

Last week, I wrote about the value of prudently selecting your tribe members. Today, I write about who you should avoid being, being with, and the peril of indifference when selecting your companions. Our moms told us not to hang out with troublemakers because she feared us becoming one. My dad told me, “If you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas.” Consider the impact interactions have on...

The words from a 1967 Beatles song remain true today, “Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends.” While we can attempt to go it alone, we should not. We are born with less knowledge than a turtle that knows to crawl out of its sandy nest and use moonlight to find its ocean home. Everything we know is taught to us; your mother had to bring you to her breast. The lessons may come at our...

Me? You may have expected the person you most need to forgive is the parent who misshaped you during your formative years or the school bully who gave you an inferiority complex. Yes, they and all who offend you need to be forgiven, but you also need it as a lack of self-forgiveness significantly impairs your ability to live a fulfilling life. Please note the use of “have been” in the title. You...

Not a Chance You often hear, “I cannot forgive them until they say they are sorry.” Those who refuse to forgive until the offender expresses remorse, offers an apology, and makes amends do not understand the purpose or consequences of forgiveness and unforgiveness. The forgiver is forgiveness’s first beneficiary. The act of forgiveness releases the wounded from the emotional burden inevitably...