


With a Little Help from My Friends
Their Part The lyrics from a 1967 Beatles song remain true today, “Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends.” We are born with less knowledge than a turtle that intuitively knows to crawl out of its sandy nest and use moonlight to find its ocean home. Someone taught us everything we know; your mother had to bring you to her breast. The lessons may come at our mother’s knee, in a...

Be Careful with Your Tribe
Magnetism and Metamorphosis Our moms told us not to hang out with troublemakers because she feared us becoming one. My dad told me, "If you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas." Noted author and motivational speaker Jim Rohn stated, "You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with." We naturally gravitate to those most like us and tend to adopt our companions' traits -...

Yes, Even When I Have Been the SOB
Me? You may expect the person you need to forgive most is the parent who misshaped you during your formative years or the school bully who gave you wedgies and an inferiority complex. Yes, you need to forgive them, but you need self-forgiveness, as an absence impedes the pursuit of a fulfilling life. Please note the use of “have been” in the title. You must come to the table of forgiveness...

Yes, Even the SOB
No Way! You often hear, “I will not forgive her until she apologizes.” When we make forgiveness contingent on the offender expressing remorse, offering an apology, and making amends, we do not appreciate the purpose of forgiveness or the consequences of unforgiveness. The forgiver is forgiveness’s first beneficiary. The act of forgiving releases the wounded from the emotional burden inevitably...

With Us or Against Us?
Don’t Throw the Baby out with the Bathwater It seems like we must answer every issue with a binary choice: yes or no. The all-or-nothing standard leads us to believe that disagreement over part is disagreement over the whole, leading to unnecessary alienation. You either approve of the political party’s entire platform or are labeled a RINO (Republican in name only). As a presidential...